LGBTQ Families: On the Outside Looking In

A few days ago we asked which candidate for president is most likely to support you and your family? We've been thinking alot about this question over the last year or so and perhaps you have too.

As we weigh the various positions of each Presidential Candidate, we always try to determine which of them is more likely to govern in a way that best reflects our philosophy about the world -- about what is right and what is true.

Prognosticators have already weighed in on how the candidates might deal with issues like the war, the economy, health care, the environment and other pressing matters of the day. You can compare the candidates here and here.

Regarding LGBTQ rights, we can pretty much rule out all of the Repugnicans -- most of whom are still catering to the wing-nut fundies.

Unfortunately, other than making vague statements about being generally supportive of LGBTQ rights, none of the Democratic Candidates provide detailed descriptions about how that will work to make like better for our families. And none of the three "front runners" seem to support the one issue that matters most to our family – marriage equality.

It isn’t that the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan are not important to us. They are. Yet regardless of which candidate gets elected, we are concerned that the multi-national military industrial complex (which permeates our government) will not give up an inch of their war-mongering without making a huge stinky smoke screen of a propaganda fiasco that will leave us all scratching our heads in wonder and hiding under our beds in fear.

We can only hope that whoever takes over the controls in January 2009 is realistic (or idealistic) enough to recognize the game and try to dismantle it without getting themselves assassinated in the process.

As for health care -- since we have no health care coverage for ourselves, we are deeply concerned about it. We hope a Democratic President will start to clear the way for universal health care – but we also know that goal requires a steep climb against the odds as the champion of that cause will be inundated with Swift-Boat-like lies and accusations of bringing the dreaded ‘socialism’ to America.

Environmental issues, climate change, a crashing economy and renewable energy matter so much to us that 3 years ago we moved to rural West Virginia where we have been building a house (on 6 acres) with our own hands using recycled materials. The house has 1 foot thick walls and an indoor greenhouse. We will also have an outdoor greenhouse, a huge organic garden as well as chickens (for eggs) and goats (for milk, cheese and as a free lawn mower!).

With little grandchildren constantly exposed to lead-laden toys and about ready to begin public school we care deeply about imports, consumer safety and about education.

But, despite our concern for these and other pressing issues, we still feel that marriage equality is right up there with all of them.

Why?

Because without the respect and dignity that eventually follows governmental sanction of our relationships -- no matter what the next president is able to accomplish in many of the areas we listed above LGBTQ families will still be outside looking in. We will continue to live in a country that thinks we are not deserving of full equality. No matter how much better the economy, the environment, education and health care, our partners and our children will not be able to fully participate. We will still have the choice of seconds or nothing.

And at a time in history that is espousing change as its central theme – we think that it is fair to demand the brass ring for LGBTQ people.

If our next president is able to pull off something as wonderful as universal health care and yet is willing to accept that some of its citizens remain less equal than others, the dream of a changed and more progressive America will remain just that – a dream.

Vote Like It’s 1968

When he was running for President, Bobby Kennedy would often end his stump speech by proclaiming "Some men see things as they are and ask, 'Why?' I dream of things that never were and ask, 'Why not?'"

Kennedy’s optimistic message – lost for decades -- has recently been excavated from the ruins of Watergate, Monica-gate, September 11, 2001 and the long desert that is the Bush Administration.

“Hope” and “change” are the main themes percolating to the top of the 2008 presidential election. This upbeat message is not only resonating with Democrats, but also with Independents, Libertarians and Republicans.

It seems most of us are finally fed up with politics-as-usual: fear mongering, war and partisan bickering.

Why is it that an optimistic message is connecting with a majority of Americans even as we face the cold reality of higher prices for groceries and gasoline, a looming recession, out-of-control national debt, a falling dollar, the threat of a job loss, mortgage foreclosure, bankruptcy, and (despite the past seven years of promises that policies enacted by the Bush Administration would keep us safe even as it lessened our individual freedoms and liberties) the real possibility of a nuclear attack on American soil?

Do we owe a debt of gratitude to Steven Colbert, who first exposed the naked Emperor behind the curtain at the White House Correspondents Dinner in 2006? That was the day that it all started – making way for others like Jon Stewart, Keith Olberman, Bill Moyers and Rachel Maddow to really start to challenge Bush and the Republicans.

Could this populist awakening be a result of more access to progressive views on the Internet?

Whatever the reason for the trend, we are excited to see that Americans are not so easily entranced by the constant barrage of subliminal and not-so-subliminal messages that we should ignore reality and consume more, fear more, hate more, and care about each other less.

People today seem more willing to question the “conventional wisdom” of pundits and pols. Do we dare dream that those are the tender shoots of a new populist movement we see sprouting up from the frozen tundra of cynicism?

If so, its really got those entrenched party partisans and talking heads so frightened they are frantically stomping their feet and spraying weed killer on all that hope and optimism lest it take hold and strangle out the power and control over our election process that they’ve enjoyed for decades.

Although we do hope the momentum will continue to swell throughout the year -- eventually cleansing America of political pessimism -- we are not so naïve as to believe the election will not be rigged.

Nonetheless, we think it is possible that young people, first time voters, independents and progressives will flock to the Democratic candidate in such high numbers that it will be impossible to totally control and fix each and every ballot.

We believe that this is precisely why the Democrats won in 2006 despite Karl Rove’s assertions that he had access to “the” numbers that showed Republicans would maintain a majority.

To successfully fix an election, the party-poopers rely on one or more of the following:

• A brainwashed electorate;
• Party bosses willing to do whatever it takes to get their candidate elected;
• Redrawing district lines to favor one party over another;
• Party loyalists who are willing to cheat;
• Easy-to hack voting machines with no paper trail;
• Voter suppression;
• Few in number but large in cash contributors having more sway than voters;
• Influential personalities willing to spin party messages and repeat talking points;
• An ignorant, lazy electorate unable or unwilling to find the truth;
• Voter apathy and/or a majority of eligible voters choosing not to vote.
  

When the primaries are over and the candidates are chosen – no matter which one is the Democrat or the Republican – those with the most to lose will line up behind the Republican (who is more likely to maintain the corporatist status quo) to point both barrels at the Democrat (who may be more likely this time to fight for the little guy).

What we can do – all of us – during that inevitable onslaught, is to avoid the same-old trap of letting the opposition frame the terms of the debate.

This time we must not let the mudslingers hide as we debate the accuracy of their swift-boating lies.

We need to expose the source of the misinformation and show that it originates from those with the most to lose – big money interests who've been getting rich and fat off our ignorance and despair.

When the Rush Limbaugh’s, Dan Bartlett’s and Karl Rove’s (or any right-wing pundit or supporter) starts spewing the old the left/right, liberal/conservative, Republican/Democrat paradigm, let’s avoid getting defensive about our candidate’s beliefs and positions.

Instead, we'll remind one another that these are the same loud-mouthed minions who carry water for big oil, big pharma and the military industrial complex.

If we can do this, then the Democratic candidate -- and the American people -- will win.